I have learned through this whole blogging process that when inspiration hits, ya just go with it. Today I have been feeling unusually inspired. It could be just one of those days or it could be due to the fact that I have seen The Greatest Showman three times in a week. Now I am feeling ready to come alive and dream with my eyes wide open (if you have seen it, you get me). If you haven't seen it go ahead and stop reading and head to the nearest movie theater and get yourself a ticket.
Anyways, today I have been feeling inspired and yeah it might be the movie or one of those days but I also think it's because I am walking through something. As my husband would say when my emotions are high that's when the magic blogging happens.
I have touched on this subject before but I think it's so important that I want to talk about it again. It's something that I constantly find myself struggling with. I want to talk about the idea of being so deeply confident in who you are in Christ that you can not and will not be shaken.
There is a passage of scripture on this that I love:
Jeremiah 17: 7-8
But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
whose confidence is in Him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out it's roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.
Isn't that what we as Christ followers are after? I have always longed to be a much more confident version of myself and to have my roots planted in the right things. I think my roots are planted right but when it comes to my leaves not being shaken.... I think I am the type where the smallest breeze and those babies would fly right off. By that I mean I know who I am in Christ but I let things of this world bring me down.
People have always told me that confidence will come with age. I heard that when I was in middle school and then I heard it again in high school and now here I am at 23 and people are still telling me it will come with age. I agree with that on a small scale. You get more used to your own skin and stop feeling so awkward all the time, sure. But the self esteem and how sensitive you are to peoples words, I think it comes not with age but with a knowledge of who God is.
Having confidence itself is a hard thing to build up especially if it's being built on the wrong things. Even building it on Christ is tough we think it should be easy. We start our relationship by having this new found life and freedom and we walk around like no one can touch us. Then people come along and ruffle us up a bit. They want to point at who you were before and all your mistakes and it makes you want to crawl back into your own skin. For every single time we let someones words or actions get to us we are slowly taking our foundation off of Christ and putting it into people's opinions of us. Which is basically like taking our foundation off a rock and moving it to quicksand.
I am using people's opinions as an example today because it is what's true for me. I am a sensitive person, I have admitted that and owned up to it because it's true and I don't think it's a bad thing in some ways. In some ways its a horrible thing like when I let peoples actions and words hurt me. Even the opposite when I let peoples actions and words build me up. It is so emotionally bad and it's all just one big roller coaster ride that I am so done riding.
Today I was just having an off day and this thought occured to me. I don't need to be torn down or validated with peoples words any longer. All I need to do is look to Christ and specifically to scripture and find out who it is God says I am.
Yesterday at church Pastor Travis asked us as we were praying to remember why we fell in love with God. At the time my mind was drawing a blank because it was so long ago. I grew up in church and got baptized when I was 8 years old so I think the real reason I came to know Christ was because my brother did and I wanted to follow along.
Today though in the midst of tears I remembered a huge reason why I fell in love with Him. It may not have been the initial reason but one that still speaks so much truth into my life. I fell in love with Him because of that fresh start He has given me. It's because He no longer looks down and sees who I once was, he doesn't see my flaws he sees me as his son, perfectly. His love for me and you is perfect. Nothing I could do could make him love me any less or any more. I long for that kind of love here on Earth and when people fall short and I fall short that's why it hurts. I fell in love with Him because he validates me and his validation speaks louder than any other validation here on Earth.
Here's what we need to do with this truth, run with it. Stop surrounding yourself with crappy people who make you feel crappy about yourself. I know some circumstances can't be changed but if you can help it do it! Find a few people who value you, build you up and speak life to you. More importantly read God's word and realize how much he believes in you. He loves you and is tired of seeing you being so swayed by the worlds view of you. Lastly we need to start being more like the tree in Jeremiah. Plant your roots in Christ and don't let anyone move you.
That is all for today folks!